What Does It All Mean ?
Here are some of my random thoughts . I got up rather early this morning . It was about 5:30 AM .
I know that because the first early morning prayer was going on from the many several mosques around my place of residence . There is something beautiful and a deep sense of calling , pleading , requesting or just needing from the Great All Whatever !
As the early morning air is cool , a freshness and an expectation is sensed to the start of another day !
I also listened to some birds that were equally starting their day !
Just decided to sit quietly and enjoy the stillness of everything .
I was able to feel a certain sense of being something bigger and vast then my limited physical /mind dimension !
The bigger sense of beingness appeared to be all around ! It felt like the very space that I was !
I felt One with all that was ! Nothing appeared out of me ! In fact , what was or who was me !
Of course , a part of my thoughts were clear that my name is Amar and I am the body and is sitting
quietly ! However , that part was just like another object that was just there ! It was like the material things lying around in the room ! The body , the sofa , the table , furniture , walls , carpet and all were just that !
They belonged to me ! Me was not belonging to them ! Me was just No-thing !
What does it mean ?!
This sense and experience of me was so much bigger than the physical Amar and all that Amar believed in !
This sense of me simply had no such beliefs at all !!
It was completely free of any such sense of belongness ! It was not even too concerned about the very body through which it was or feeling the experience !
I was able to have a dialogue with the bigger whatever me was ! I here was Amar ! I know it is getting slightly confusing and even bordering a state of being crazy to put it mildly ! After all I am a medical doctor , trained in Psychological medicine and also had training in psychotherapy !
Why would I want to share this experience and get myself in trouble !!
Do I have a death wish for my character and standing in my society or even in my new standing in this vast virtual world !
What does it matter !
Yes , I can be labelled which ever way one wants ! Some will call me crazy or even worst ! Some might even call me an awakening soul ! Majority or most simply have no time for me !!
They have their worries to think about ! Why bother about this persons early morning rumblings !
My simple point is this : If I am going crazy , than it is good and okay ! No worries ! No problem and we move on our separate worlds ! Mine of going or becoming crazy and your sane world that you think is going to give you much ! So be it !
What if I am actually moving beyond the narrow physical dimension of existence and am becoming aware of something much bigger and vast ?!
What does it all mean ?!
I sat watching my state of thoughts and a sense of just being !
The vast Me is ever being and Amar just got up and went about it's normal routine !!
The vast Me does not belong , has no sense of belonging and yet appears to be there for All !
The v
ast Me does not even belong to Me !!
I think I have gone far enough for today ! Every extra word is taking me deeper from a point of no return !
Anyway , What does it matter !
Will end today . You are welcome to comment or have your say ?
Till we meet again , take care .
Amar.
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